Last week I had the pleasure of getting together with Mark Schwaber, who looks like he’ll be playing some stuff on some songs (Flowers On The Fire Escape, Fight Or Flight, Other States). He  brought a lot of ideas to the table. It was refreshing to hear these songs in a new light. We’re getting together again this evening, along with Greg Saulmon whose guitar stylings will be surely welcome. Greg has played along with me for my last couple of shows.

It’s been great for me to think about working with a  bunch of different musicians. One of the challenges, however (for them, mostly), is that I don’t really have many demos of most of my songs. So I setup the dining room last night and recorded a couple tunes so I can pass them around and see if anyone wants to play on them. Also it was my first foray into Garageband recording so I wanted to see if I could act like I knew what I was doing. I used some pretty shitty mics and mic stands and the cats were running around, so I did a few takes.

The Gatekeeper is a song I wrote last week. Not sure if it’ll be on the album, but here it is. I recorded this live while singing along to what I was playing.

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Fourth Floor is a Northernly song I’m hoping to convince Aric Bieganek and Rebekah Dutkiewicz to record with me. I recorded the piano track first, then put down the vocal track.

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You can read all about the process of starting the new record here.

I went up to meet with Dave Chalfant to discuss my forthcoming album a few weeks ago. Dave’s studio is in Conway, Massachusetts, on top of a hill, up a bunch of dirt roads and things. It’s in a place where you can see the stars at night.

I thought I’d have time to stop and get my headlight bulb replaced, except I got stuck in some traffic on I-91, so there wasn’t enough time. I wound up driving through the dark, hilly, woods to Conway with one headlight like that Wallflowers song. The snowbanks were so high I felt like my car was on a bobsled track.

I told Dave all my ideas for making a record… what I liked and didn’t like– why I wanted to do this. He calmly nodded and seemed to understand what I was going for. We both were pretty jazzed about the project. I told him about the grant I received from The SAMFund, and how it is somewhat bittersweet, and how I want to to my best to honor it.

The SamFUND is an organization that I learned more about when I played a benefit concert at PACE in Easthampton, Massachusetts. It was in honor of Andrea Coller, a local musician who passed away last April. I performed one of Andrea’s songs, “Call After Midnight”, and one of my own, “Kindred”. In between I talked about my own experience with cancer, and how heartbreaking it was to know that Andrea dealt with a lot of the same things– and worse, before she passed away. Even though we were only casual aquaintances at best, it was just really really difficult to process. But it reminded me how vastly important songwriting and music is– how it contributes to the world and how cathartic it is.

After I performed “Kindred”, I left the stage and pretty much lost it. Sam came backstage, introduced herself, and hugged me. We talked about how much cancer totally sucks. I told her about how much music meant to me, and how over the past number of years, between being sick, trying to restore my normal life again, and land on my feet financially, it wasn’t in the cards for me to make a record. She encouraged me to put a proposal together, write an essay, and apply for a SAMFund grant.

Initially, I felt enormously guilty about it. I kept thinking that there were more deserving people, that I’d be able to make a record one day down the line, I just had to make some sacrifices and save for a number of years first. Besides, I still had some other medical expenses I had to pay off– it was kind of silly to to make a record when I still had debts to pay. But I was encouraged by Sam, my wife Kristen, family and friends. And the more I thought about it, the more I began to see this as a responsibility to myself. I’m truly so tired of putting things off. I had to do that for a good portion of my twenties. Cancer can suck an egg, really. If I didn’t this now, then when?

I submitted a proposal, toiled over and sent in my essay. I wasn’t really confident I would get picked. When I did, I was truly honored. I couldn’t believe it, really. This was really going to happen. I was elated. But I wasn’t prepared for what I would learn next.

From The SAMFund:

In honor of her life, the The SAMFund has established the Andrea Coller Memorial Award, to be given to individuals who share Andrea’s passion and strength of spirit. Andrea’s friends and family will be involved in the selection process.

Sam called me while I was at work to tell me that Andrea’s family and friends selected me to be the first recipient of the Andrea Coller Memorial Award. Even just typing that now, I still can’t quite believe it. When I found out, I was in absolute awe. I somehow had to return to work and finish the work day and process what this all meant.

I won’t ever be able to express my gratitude or how humbling it is to know that Andrea’s family and friends think that I’m deserving of this. All I can do is honor it, and pour my heart and soul into making this record. And everything is starting to come together. I’ve been working with other musicians to work out some arrangements. I’m sending things to Dave Chalfant at Sackamusic. I’m writing and re-writing things. I have all these ideas. And I’m so grateful that I get to do this.

This is all really happening.